the raven haired man took a deep breath, letting it out slowly, as he was let into the party that a friend had invited him to. he was beyond exhausted, muscles aching with every movement he made. dustin wanted nothing more than to soak in a tub full of hot water with his favorite musical soundtracks playing the background, eyes closed and relaxing for once. but, between the show that he’d recently joined and the fact that he’d already agreed to attend this stupid party, he had no choice but to skip out on the bath and put in an appearance.
feeling more than a little grumpy, he put on a show for his friend, all wide smiles and playful banter as he subtly edged away from them and started towards the bar. if he was going to get through this, he definitely needed a stiff drink. barely repressing a yawn, he leaned against the bar and put in his order, a part of his mind wondering if he should have just said fuck it and given an excuse not to come.
“I swear I know you from somewhere,” Blaine sat at the bar rocking a glass back and forth in his hand. Eyes were narrowed into the contents. A light tan mixed with ice and the smell of wooden barrels and liquor came from it as the ice cubes clinked together. Whiskey that he’s been nursing way too long but even though high school and Ohio were a couple years away? Time had done nothing to help him build up any sort of admirable tolerance for the stuff.
In other words? He was still a bumbling lightweight that only needed maybe two of these and he’d be stumbling out to a cab way past the borderline of buzzed and heading straight to Drunk Town.
Recognition finally lit his face up and he turned on the stool, heels of brown leather dress shoes hooked into the rung of his chair tucking back in place. “Golds–Goolsby..,” he hummed when he nailed the name, “You were the Vocal Adrenaline coach. How long’ve you been here? New York, I mean?” If Blaine could wager a guess, the reason they were both at the party was because of one thing. The stage had to be it. Blaine had barely gotten his shoes scuffed by it (better than saying feet wet) yet but with the small part in the play he nabbed? He might be on his way?
OF COURSE HE DOESN’T CARE WHO SEES THEM ; it didn’t even come down to a label ( it was the only thing that mattered in mckinley ) . blaine was his best friend and ultimately that was the only thing that mattered to him . sam hugs him tightly , squeezes him , cheek against cheek . there’s something weirdly intimate about it and even though sam recognizes the undertone to a simple friendly hug between them , he doesn’t pull away .
“ you’re my best friend , of course i know when you’re down in the dumps …” he laughs , pulling back and keeping his hands on blaine’s shoulders . “ do you wanna talk about it or maybe hang out tonight ?y’know , cheer you up . there’s a horror movie marathon at the drive in and we could get some pizza on the way … maybe some fries … and a milkshake too .”
“You’re amazing. You know?” His words were soft. Barely above a breath and he had no idea if Sam heard. No matter. They were a confession brought on by a rambling mind blurting out the last bits of what came across his thoughts. Blaine wouldn’t be the first one to pull back if the world depended on it. Wild horses couldn’t drag him away. Isn’t the saying? Far as he was concerened? This was the best thing that’s happened to him all week. Just one moment where he could hug Sam incredibly tight and keep him there. Feel this kind of connection that was a promise in and of itself. I got you and I got you, too.
Blained turned his head and tucked the bridge of his nose against Sam’s collar. Best friend. Sam had a way of saying that, that you could tell he meant it. It wasn’t something you say to every friend like a lot of people do. And it meant the world to him. Hazel eyes met Sam’s as their corners pinched together with his ear to ear smile. “You’re mine, too.” Talk. He cringed and shook his head but quickly perked at the mention of drive in a horror marathon. “Yes! Yes! Let’s go! I’ll fill the car up with blankets. Get all the junk food we want and make a night out of it. That’s perfect, actually.” His hand gripped Sam’s forearms as he jerked both eyebrows up. “Have I told you lately how much I appreciate you? For everything. I’d be lost without you.” One more squeeze and he let one hand fall but the other remained in place. “I mean it.”
“WELL, I’M NOT LOOKING to get myself into any trouble, so i’m probably gonna have to run it by her.” finn played along with the joke, offering a fleeting little smile. his gaze returned to the floor, though, elbows resting on his knees as he hunched forward in his chair. “i’m just stuck with this one, i guess. i don’t even know where to start, and… this kinda stuff usually comes easier to me, i guess.” he exhaled, knowing external stress was affecting his performance in glee club, though that wasn’t anything he wanted to unload on blaine. “maybe i’ll sit this week out, just do whatever group thing mr. schue puts together for us.” he’d had a headache every day of the week from getting all worked up over the end of high school, and he’d been retreating to his bedroom whenever he was home to try and nap it off to no avail. finn didn’t feel like exerting the extra brain power.
Rocking in his seat while slowly shaking his head, Blaine jutted out his bottom lip in a noooo way pout before his flimsy composure broke and he burst into a chuckle. Arms crossed loosely over his chest relaxed to reach over and give Finn’s wrist a squeeze followed with a pat. “You’re doing fine. There’s a lot on everyone’s mind. It’s not worth you sitting out, though. We’re going to get this. Together. I promise. You know one day,” he retracted his hand and used it to point towards Finn, wrist curled up and his pointer bobbing to stress his point, “you and I? We’re going to be in-laws. Someday. We got to stick together and help each other. Yeah?”
Dropping his hand to rest on the opposite forearm, a crinkle of thought formed between dark brows. Did he have his own worries about what graduation was doing to them? To him and Kurt? Yeah. But Finn didn’t need his problems either. One year. They only had to make it through one year. His smile returned and he inched closer to peer down at Finn’s writing. “You know you can always talk to me? No matter what right? Also, what is written under that band name you crossed out?”
“so … i totally wanna give you a hug right now , not only for helping me out but because it looks like you really need one . correct me if i’m wrong dude , but i hate seeing you bummed out . c’mere .” sam’s arms spread in offering , ignoring the crowd of students that walk beside them and the sound of the bell signaling the start of next period . he wasn’t moving until blaine returned the hug anyway ( even if it meant being late for spanish ) .
Blaine couldn’t help tucking his chin towards his collar and smiling at Sam’s sudden need to hug him. Even if he felt his cheeks grow a little hotter than he might’ve liked them to? Blaine’s heart about leapt out of his chest and floated away at the offer. Having Sam not care about who might see them? Or the ringing bell? Made it even more sweet and kind. AKA: The definition of Sam Evans. He wouldn’t deny him even if he could. “Yeah, okay..,” he smiled one more time. So much gratitude for such a simple gesture.
He stepped into Sam’s awaiting arms and wrapped his own up underneath so he could sling them around his shoulders and pull him in Long fingers pressed their tips into soft flannel. Maybe a little too tight. “How’d you guess? Anyway. I’m glad you did. Thank you.”
Sebastian felt empty. He knew that Blaine walking out wouldn’t make him feel any better. The damage was done now, and he wouldn’t be able to get Blaine out of his head for weeks, much less the next few hours, locked in a white room alone and bored out of his mind. He was between a rock and a hard place, as he usually was when it came down to Blaine. The other staying would only give him bitterness over the fact that he wasn’t SUPPOSED to be there in the first place, and that nothing good ever came out of it in the end. He’d gone through that road too many times now not to know better. And on the other hand, he didn’t want to be alone either, but it seemed like the only option. He played vaguely with the idea of going through phone’s contacts, looking for someone he could call, that’d actually show up to something like this. There was none, of course. He didn’t have FRIENDS, not like Blaine, he had booty calls, and acquaintances. And for most part he was fine with it. Except for times like these.
Blaine looked like he was about to implode, and Sebastian felt pissed about how much he hated to see him like that, and yet he also knew he’d hate more to see a different type of guilt in his eyes. He wondered if Blaine regretted ever helping him. He felt his throat tighten bitterly, and he had to ask. He had to know what was going through Blaine’s head when he did that. If he even cared at all, still.
He looked at Blaine as Blaine didn’t look at him, and felt frustrated that he couldn’t just see through the honeyed eyes, like he usually did. He screwed his eyebrows at the words, frowning, then swallowed.
“Sure… Just not enough, right?” Only enough to put them through shit, but not enough to want to actually stick around. “I can’t— DO this, anymore, Blaine. We can’t keep starring in this shitshow. This whole pretending I’m one of your ducklings, thing. It’s not true. We both know that. And it feels like hell.” He swallowed, tighter, chapped lips parting. He hated to admit those things, but he had no choice. “This halfway thing we’ve always had, it doesn’t work.” He gave him a look, daring Blaine to contradict him. Even back when they were just trying to be friends, Blaine was embarrassed of it, hiding it from his real ones, keeping Sebastian at arm’s length. And even after they’d finally shared a bed, it’d still been a font of guilt and shame, and something that could never live out of four walls. “Never did.” He grasped at the sheets on his lap with his non injured hand. “And it doesn’t go anywhere good.” He downed his eyes then, looking sideways. “You gotta let go.” And I do too.
Hurt eyes watched Sebastian warily. His breath stopped and he was frozen. Every bit of himself waiting for the reaction to his reply to come crashing down because that was exactly what he knew was going to happen. Sebastian asked the question but he already had the answer in his head. Blaine’s gut told him that regardless of how what he said? Sebastian’s mind was made up. He made a mistake. He wasn’t welcome here. Nothing he said he did could change those two facts. But he didn’t regret coming. There wasn’t a shred of a fiber in his being that would allow him to turn his back on someone he cared about after witnessing them nearly die and walk away as if he was never there.
Blaine would rather take any amount of pain than live with the question of what might’ve happened had things been a little worse when they got here. If Sebastian might’ve been gone forever in a matter of minutes. Or hours. He would have to live with himself knowing that he was last person who to see him and could’ve been there. Only, instead, he simply left him to suffer alone. Maybe that amount of guilt was what he deserved. Not knowing, going home, sitting up forever reading the newspaper or calling hospitals to see if Sebastian made it without him being any the wiser that someone out there was worried. Maybe that panic was what fate decided to dish out to him. God knows he was a horrible person to him when they were close. What right did he have to the peace of mind that he felt last night knowing Sebastian was safe and he’d be okay? None.
Nor did he have any right to hope that this might be some sort of turning point. That Sebastian would listen to his truth and, if he was willing, let him be there to help. A groundwork for something better than they ever had. Something built from the literal pavement up.
“I get it,” his voice cracked and his heart fell, “I never gave you enough. You’ve made that abundantly clear. All of this was a mistake. I understand. How many times do you have to say it? I messed up. Is it really a surprise? That’s all I ever seem capable of doing with you. I made the wrong choice coming and an even poorer one when I stayed. I hurt you. Again.” Deserving nothing and expecting too much, Blaine’s gaze dropped to the ground when Sebastian finally spoke up and said what he was anticipating. In very easy to understand simplicity. Time to let go. For real. Time to say goodbye and never come back. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for things to turn out like this. Or any of it to turn out the way it did. I—it doesn’t matter.” His shoulders slouched and he looked all the more small the more he caved into himself. Like he’d just curl up until he disappeared if he had the ability. “I’ll listen. You won’t see me–” A pained sound left him at the last part and he was crying but hospitals were used to that. “–I promise, Sebastian.” He couldn’t breathe and his throat couldn’t squeak out the last of what he had to say, so he smiled a goodbye and turned to go before he really lost it in front of him. Cause that was his own problem to deal with.
// There’s a post going around on my dash from a lot of my partners about post length. It’s always been something I’ve been self conscious about. Whether I write too much or too little. I’ve always made it clear to everyone who writes with me that all I want for them is to enjoy themselves and reply back with what strikes them. Long as I have something to write from? That’s all that matters. Obviously that’s not an issue if we’ve been writing.
However. The amount of anxiety I’ve had in the past for trimming posts because people don’t want more than two or three lines is ridiculous. It made me almost quit tumblr more than half a dozen times. If you have a partner who paras often? Surrounding you with scenery, emotional content and push forward in plot? It’s because they love what you’re doing together. They love writing. They love the story they want to tell. With someone they enjoy writing with. Someone’s writing a ton and you’re uncomfortable? Let them know. But be aware that posting something like that? Is bound to make people like me (who can post a two line starter one day and a four paragraph starter the next depending on mood and UNF) feel even worse and kinda avoid initiating anything. Which is why I usually let a lot of people write the starters nowadays. So, I can match them out of fear they won’t want to write with me anymore.
And that’s a really shitty feeling. Which is the exact opposite of the good feeling I had when I dove into something for my partner and loved every word that came out. It’s not filling linesfor some people. For some people, like me? It’s enjoying our world we created and having a good time.
A mad cackle ehoes through the room as he’s lifted up and spun. Dizzy with his head still spinning even after they came to an abrupt stop, Blaine loooped his arms around Barry’s shoulders and returned the kiss. Pausing only to come up for air, he pressed their foreheads together and stared between them at the lips he couldn’t wait to capture again. “Missed you.” No sorries were given because there were no sorries to be had when he pounced on the idea to kiss him again. Once, twice..eh..they could stay like this for all he cared. Lips locked and him eagerly claiming Barry’s mouth. There were plenty of worse ways to spend an evening.
Dave couldn’t help but laugh at Blaine’s over-selling of his big spoon game. It was easily the most adorable thing he’d ever heard in his life, though he wasn’t going to say anything just yet. He didn’t want to ruin the moment right now. It was much too nice and if he said anything, he had a feeling that he might say something that could completely ruin all of it. That wasn’t what he wanted. He wanted to be close to Blaine, he wanted to enjoy the closeness and the intimacy. He wanted to enjoy feeling good for once in his life. With someone that understood what he’d been through, with someone that didn’t judge him for his past.
He never would have imagined getting this lucky in all of his life but here he was, with Blaine tucked in against his chest and their hands laced together. This was something he could have only dreamt of just a few years back. Things were changing and for the better. His heart raced a little faster as Blaine began to press kisses to his knuckles and he squeezed Blaine’s hand gently, cheeks bright pink. “I’m really, really, happy with you.” Dave said quietly, ducking his head to press a few gentle kisses to Blaine’s shoulder and neck. “I’ve never been so happy.”
Hearing Dave whisper how happy he was made Blaine feel as if he were light as air. A soft smile was pressed against the pillow, his nose brushing over the soft fabric. The happiness beamed out of him in his voice, a cracked and content. “Good. The one thing I want to make sure I’m doing right is making you happy. After all you’ve done for me.” Feeling the nearness of fingertips near his lips, Blaine felt his pulse pick up as he kissed over them and brought the velvet caress of his lips to a pause of warm breath ghosting over the moisture his pecks. “You make me happy, too.”
Goosebumps chased after Dave’s kisses. His neck a weakspot that made him shudder. “You are? Good..” Letting his foot slide back, he hooked it over Dave’s calf and scooted it forward to tangle their legs together. A flex of his fingers brought Dave’s hand up over his cheek and turned his head back just enough to trace the lines inside his palm with his lips, nose, breath. Oh, this felt far too good. “I’m so glad for that night. You know that?” Words muttered, nearly muffled against skin covering Dave’s wrist. Then nothing but a quiet hum when his pulse picked up to a rabbit’s foot pace. The warmth of his lips wrapped around Dave’s thumb and he took it between them indulging himself with a taste of his skin. Having a moment like this after pushing it off for so long? How could he not?
pianokeysandbowties back up 