❝ I think the one who wears the collar fits much better in the doghouse. ❞ And there goes the worlds biggest devious grin into action. Don’t test Sebastian Smythe.
❝ That’s simple logic. ❞
“So what you’re saying is it’s time to bring back Time Out?” Blaine swallows thickly and crosses his arms. “If we’re going by–you know–simple logic,” he gives his boyfriend a quizzical, playfully expectant eyebrow lift. Oh! Blaine will test him! So hard–Sebastian will think he’s in school and the teacher just shouted ‘pop quiz!’ to wake him up from an impromptu desk-nap time!
❝ And why is that? Because not only do I cope with a raging Diva from day to day but I also cope with a complete jerk? Ah, yes. You know my struggle well. So considerate, baby. ❞
“Wow. You always say such nice things to me. I love you, too. Keep it up. Apparently someone wants to end up in the doghouse again tonight. I’m starting to think you like it there.”
❝ Hey babe, get over here. You won’t believe this, it’s the strangest thing. I’m reading a book called My Boyfriend Is A Raging Diva and it really reminded me of you. ❞
“Oh really? Sounds like a fascinating read, Sebastian. You should try reading the sequel when you’re done. It’s called Living With A Complete Jerk: A User’s Guide To Coping. Totally reminds me of you.”
Widened, unamused eyes focus at the chewed up shoe lying on the floor. He had pair upon pair that looked just like them, but it was the fact that he had been trying to tell the dog no for weeks and yet he still came home to another possession with teeth marks on it. Slowly moving his stone cold stare upwards, he sees the little devil that had been brought into their home by Blaine Anderson himself. The longer puppy dog eyes stared up at him, the more he hated how easy it was to dismiss his disobedience. God dammit, Perry was so cute. Why did he have to be so cute? It would be so much easier to scold him if he wasn’t adorable. Blaine will just have to handle this one. ❛ Blaine, get in here. ❜ he shouts from their bedroom, trying to refrain from sounding furious.
Blaine sat on the piano bench humming low and tap-tapping an ivory key trying to figure out a melody he couldn’t get out of his head. A trickle of notes that were becoming something but he wasn’t sure what–yet. It was right there. On his fingertips. Almost. Another tink, tink but above the sound came an unexpected interruption. Shouted in a tone that made him cringe. Sebastian’s ‘I’m holding anger in by trying to try not to sound like I’m holding anger in–yet I’m shouting’ tone. Sucking in a deep breath–Blaine groaned and slowly stood. He didn’t do anything but someone did a bad and that left only one other person. Perry. “Oh no.. Please no.” Dragging steps carried him down the hall like it was the Green Mile. Gravity pulled his attention to the mess of a former shoe and the bowtied Corgi bumbling over with it hanging from his mouth. “Uhm–Perry–,” he peeked over at Sebastian. Nose scrunch! Pleadingly wide stare? “On a scale of one to ten? How mad are you and how much trouble am I in?”
What Blaine had said about Sebastian’s father loosing his mind was true in some ways. He was going to be furious for sure, but after months pass by he’s going to let his son drift away. This was all a manual on how to disappear completely. Sebastian knows the credit cards will be shut off eventually, && he probably won’t even belong to the Smythe name ever again. No more obnoxious dinner parties, nothing. That’s what happened with Sebastian’s deceased older brother, Damian. He passed of a drug overdose because he was bullied at Dalton && Mr. Smythe wanted to forget that his eldest child was ever even born. Suicide was weak, he used to say. Mr. Smythe put a halt to bullying at Dalton back in 2005 because of Damian’s tragic death but refused to talk about it after that. Demands of removing pictures that had any with Damian’s face && pretending like the mistake child, Sebastian, was the only one left. Eventually, Sebastian was an artificial only child. Now, he knows he’ll end up being cut out of the family picture too. If only half the people knew how fucked up things were behind the curtains. Luckily Blaine standing up to his feet && pulling Sebastian into a hug woke him up from the deep thought trail of his family situation. He had always been curious to know more about Blaine’s relatives. The closest he ever got was coming to hang out in his room, && Sebastian wasn’t quite the ‘bring home to mother’ type.
Sebastian wrapped around Blaine tightly, smiling widely as he wishes for it to last longer. New York was all so new, so many strangers. A familiar voice && heartbeat alike was nice in between all of the change he’d been enduring. As their bodies pull away from each other, he glances down at the seat that had been offered to him. Blaine wanted him to sit? Sebastian still found it crazy that Blaine Anderson wasn’t on a date right now. It was almost too good to be true. His lips part, head almost ready to slowly shake no because even a small part of him couldn’t believe this was happening. But he looks around to see his date still hasn’t shown himself, the hot power bottom from Tinder might not show himself at all. Which, suddenly, was starting to sound perfect to Sebastian. He sits down, a smirk spreading across his face like this was all a parallel of the first time they sat at a table across from each other during Sebastian’s freshman year. ❛ —–Actually… No. I don’t have any plans. I had something but decided to cancel.
❜&& by cancel, he meets he just now decided Blaine was becoming his plans for the night.
❛
I could continue to ask you the same question. How is the one && only Blaine Anderson spending Valentines Day alone?❜
Sebastian sitting down made the answer to his question pretty crystal clear and there was a leap of joy in Blaine’s pulse that picked up the tempo. Valentine’s Day with Sebastian Smythe via quick darting escape of his should-be date? Weirder things have happened in Blaine’s life. Sure. But this was right up there in the top five. He settled into the chair, palms pressed to the table and the same bright eyed, cheeky smile he had since the hug lasted through his chair scooting forward. It even endured the excited fidget with the tablecloth he didn’t realize he was doing. Until he did–and made himself stop. Blaine should have expected the inevitable question of how he ended up at a restaurant alone on Valentine’s Day. Was it horrible of him to wish it was just put off until there were a few more drinks in their systems and either his instinctual aversion of his gaze towards the floor wouldn’t have happened. Or if it did? Sebastian would be too buzzed to notice–or so he’d hope. That way? Then the dying out of the light in his eyes wouldn’t have stood out as much as it probably did the second either. He flinched, snagged the edge of his bottom lip and both brows shot up.
“I–uh. Long story,” roughly translated into Blaine was about to skip most of it because it wasn’t one he was quick to share with many people. He didn’t go rushing off to talk to anyone about it. Barely answered any phone calls from the ones who knew. His status on social media was probably the same because he hadn’t logged onto it since. If anyone missed it? It was his problem. On purpose. Not theirs. It was just a wound he liked leaving closed and every time it got brought up? He swore all it did was pick open the scratch. “We came back here and things were great. Really great. Then? Really great fell into sort of okay and that ended up turning out to be not good at all. A few months ago? Not good at all turned into nothing at all and he–um. Nothing was anyone’s fault–I think? I never got many answers.” His chest rose sharply with a deep breath through his nose. When he stopped staring at his hands and looked at Sebastian instead? The spark was there again but he returned to being all smiles. “Anyway! That’s how I ended up spending Valentine’s Day alone.” Here came the stuttered bait and switch. Jokingly confused gaping mouth to top it off and drive it home. “Did you change your plans five minutes ago? Or did you before? Because,” his fingers steepled in his chest and his head cocked to the side, “I don’t want to be the person responsible for two people being stood up on Valentine’s Day..eh..wait..damn it. Um. Ignore that.”
Finally at Blaine’s house, he turns off the GPS app on his phone. The nine p.m full moon is beaming light down through his windows as he looks at the steps he’ll be walking up soon.
Feet wont un-glue themselves from the floor of his car as slender fingers stay gripped to the wheel. iPod is playing on the speakers at an almost mute volume, songs that usually give him confidence. But he’s afraid, afraid of what he’s made of himself still. Sebastian created the illusion of a monster. Even though Blaine had made it clear that he accepted Sebastian’s apology, he still felt horrible. Finally taking a deep breath, he grabbed the coffee from the cup holder && got out the drivers seat.
Blaine had mentioned the door was unlocked, so Sebastian wearily opened it up to find turned off lights&&made his way down the hallwaytowards Blaine’s room. A sliver of light was glowing from the bottom of the door, contrasting with the rest of the house. Pressing a light knock to his door, he waited for a response. Silence. Furrowing an eyebrow, he slowly cracks it open to find Blaine passed out on his bed. Sebastian smiles the slightest, not a smirk, just a smile. Blaine looked fast asleep, peaceful && delicate. He’d never seen Blaine asleep before, && even though he felt semi creepy he couldn’t keep from staring at him for a moment. He was so god damn handsome. It sucked to think that the reason he had that eye patch on was because of Sebastian himself.
Tiptoeing fully into the room, he sets the coffee down on his nightstand that sat next to Blaine’s sleepy head && takes a spot at the edge of the bed as quietly as he can. Sebastian didn’t want to wake him, he must be tired from all of what he’s been through lately. Eyes scanned around the bedroom, observing it innocently. Spotting a picture of Kurt && him on Blaine’s desk, Sebastian stares at it for a moment. He looks so happy next to Kurt. Why did Sebastian do any of this? This was just a couple that wanted nothing but love, yet he kept finding new ways to try && corrupt it. Self-ashamed, he frowns a little, pressing down on his bottom lip with the top one in regret. He knew what he needed to do, he needed to break down those stone walls he hid behind for once && for all.
Staying awake became increasingly difficult the more the painkillers kicked into overdrive. As out of the blue as it was–it ended up with him inviting Sebastian over and then remembering he was about thirty minutes away from passing back out from the haze they put him into he’d just woken up from before their ‘talk’. His request for coffee was a means of combatting that drowsiness but he deeply underestimated their strength versus his tolerance. He battled it for about ten minutes–head bobbing and jerking back up from where he sat back against his headboard. Then he was laying down and there was an idea of getting out of bed and walking around the house that crossed his mind. Before the pillow started to feel too good against his cheek–that thought was a good one. Better than almost falling asleep sitting up?
The covers pulled up to his chest weren’t helping win the chilly room much favor on where he’d rather be. Out light a light seconds later. Down for the count. One arm draped over his middle and the other cupping the back of his head between his hair and the pillowcase. Donezo. Sebastian coming into the house and shutting the door downstairs made Blaine shift closer to the land of the living. Eyelids fluttered but then evened out again once there was silence. A rustle on the bed shortly after woke him up for real. He laid there motionless trying not to give up the fact that he was awake just long enough that it took him to look through a veil of black eyelashes up to Sebastian who was staring at the picture of Kurt and him on his nightstand.
One of several around the room that happened to be right there. He wondered what was going on in his thoughts behind the thoughtful, stoic mask that Sebastian wore. Did he think he was a goofball for having pictures of someone he saw practically every day littering his room? That was okay. He could. It would only embarrass Blaine a little if he said something about it. “Hey,” he whispered in a voice scratchy from sleep when he decided to clue Sebastian in that he was awake. “Are you okay?” He hoped that by coming here Sebastian walked into something better than he would have if he went home. Not just a different house filled with another problem that would weigh him down.
“ I’ll never hate you, Blaine. I couldn’t. I’ve hit the lowest of lows trying to prove myself to you. I make enemies for myself like a stripper makes one dollar bills. I know what having a dark side means, I know what it looks like. We all have one—- but yours, I’ll never hate yours. Don’t you get it? We’ve both fucked up, but I—- “ he stopped in his attempt at being genuine, furrowing his eyebrows as the words he was about to say got cut off by fear. He wanted to say the ultimate truth, the thing he had been running from in his mind. The thing that made him use Hunter Clarington in the most wrongful of ways. The thing that gave Sebastian the determination to run after Blaine for years. That thing was a thing called love. Sebastian fell in love with Blaine so fast, so hard; ever since then it had been a battle owning up to his emotions. Perhaps saying it would change things, make it all better. But as silence lingered the clouds in Sebastian’s head space masked the sun && he began to think that saying it would make Blaine run away forever. He knew that Blaine wanted him back, but maybe love, && not just like, was only present on Sebastian’s side.
A deep breath was taken, holding it for a moment before releasing it slowly. He began softening his features as he moves away from Blaine’s lips, still close enough to stay intimate as ever. Eyes met the ones staring across from him as he bites down on his bottom lip anxiously, wishing there was a way to look deeper inside of them. If only everything could be a happy ending, but that just wasn’t how life worked && Sebastian knew that all too well; better than most ever would. There was a pain in his eyes because they were so close to something good. So soon to being lost in time, but one little thing kept pressing pause && building up unknown lengths of anticipation. Blaine was clearly still devoted to that certain someone else. Sebastian refused to make a fool of himself, he refused to loose this battle that was making Blaine realize they were perfect for each other. That Sebastian could treat Blaine so well, that they connected on a level that nobody else ever would. They both had grief, && regrets; a dark side. But all at once, impulse took the stage, && Sebastian spit out the statement he had been holding in for so long. “ ——I love you. “
There was no other way to put it. Sebastian had cast some sort of spell on him that kept his limbs frozen. Fingers cupping the back of Sebastian’s neck while the other set twisted into the fabric on his shoulder. Blaine stayed with his heels slightly in the air and his eyes locked on Sebastian’s–even in this closeness that he couldn’t bear to break–as he listened to the taller boy try to put Blaine’s fears of ruining them to rest. Sebastian had one thing so infinitely wrong between them. Try to prove himself? If he was still doing that? It was time to stop. “You won’t? But look at what I did-,” his whisper came out choked and barely there. The knowing Blaine once had in regards to Sebastian Smythe and the man he thought he was had been broken at one point–yes. But they’d gone through so much to rebuild those bridges. Yes–there might be weak spots here and there still. But even they would get stronger in time–hell–they barely existed anymore as it was. “I wouldn’t have come to you if you still needed to prove yourself to me, Seb. Please stop. This isn’t about proving yourself. I know we both messed up.” Blaine leaned closer. Closer. To the point he could practically taste the words forming between his and Sebastian’s lips. The flavor was a mix of the air they were breathing and the taste of their skin blended together. His question was almost forgotten. He was almost there.
Sebastian’s deep breath lulled him back to Earth and the space that was put between them had him crashing down the rest of the way. Blaine slowly blinked and swallowed desperate gulps of air. Navy blue was balled up into tighter fist–Sebastian’s neck supported some of Blaine’s weight like he was trying to get that closeness back. “I know we–but–you what?” –I love you.– Sebastian didn’t need to repeat himself for Blaine to hear it again. –I love you.— The echo of it bounced from Blaine’s memory right to his heart. The insides of his lips were bit between his teeth. He wanted to tell Sebastian he didn’t deserve someone loving him back. That–eventually–he’d ruin that feeling because he was an idiot and messed up the one thing that he promised he never would. Blaine wanted to do a lot of things. Walk out. Hang tighter to the body he clung to. Say it back. God, the longer he stared up at him–the more he wanted to. Maybe it was because he felt like Sebastian just took his wrist when he was about to fall and pulled him to his feet. “Sebastian..” Maybe he was so tired of being lonely for months before and now months after. Or maybe one of those notions to say something he’d felt and cut off so many times. Whatever the reason–the next thing that happened didn’t come from words he was afraid he’d fail at but it came from the same place. The hand holding Sebastian’s blazer tugged him forward–the fingers cupping Sebastian’s neck helped and their lips met again. No timid try. No hesitation. Just a mouth that nudged Sebastian’s open so it could pour every unsaid word inside before he made the regretful mistake of missing this chance that he just didn’t want to fight off for the dozenth time. Not anymore.
2:37 AM. A light drew his eyes open and he had the craziest notion it was daytime until the room went black and the arm across his middle from behind pulled him close. 2:39 AM. He could barely reach the nightstand when his silent cell lit up again. Fingers wriggled and snatched it though he wished he didn’t. Reason number uno why he normally turned off his ringer when Sebastian had things to do in the mornings that Blaine didn’t have school? Drunk friends. Everyone knew he’d come get them if they needed. Hard to say no but easier on the conscience to sleep through it. See? Logic.
What defied logic was the name he saw that made his pulse jump into hyperdrive. Kurt? ‘What,’ silently played out over his lips as the screen went dark. Blaine felt his heart sink when it flashed bright immediately after. Something was wrong. A glance over his shoulder confirmed Sebastian was still asleep–breathing softly and his eyelashes twitched and pinched closed. Blaine gently took hold of his wrist, eased away and slowly got out of bed. His screen blipped out as he pulled on his boxers. Sebastian’s shirt was the closest thing to grab from the line of their clothes strung to the bed from the door. So he tossed that on, too.
He barely made it to the hallway before he returned the call.
“Kurt. H-Hi. I was asleep.” The frantic sound of his ex’s voice made his blood run cold. “Kurt? I can’t understand. Just breathe–.” What he heard next stopped him at the entrance to the living room. Wide eyes stared towards the dimly lit fireplace. “Burt’s what? Where? Why am..Oh. Listen, Kurt. He’s going to be okay. I promise. I gotta go grab things and–. Call you when I’m on the way. ..I know.. You’re welcome.” –Did that just happen? It did. How am I supposed to explain—- Blaine looked at the ceiling like it had the answer waiting when he heard a shuffle of footsteps. His gaze flicked up to see Sebastian’s confusion. Blaine shook his head appearing just as bewildered, held up his phone and wiggled it. “Sorry to wake you. I was trying not to–uh–that–was Kurt. Something happened and he asked mefor help.”
‘Just try and listen to me, just try and look at me, I can be someone else for you, I swear I WILL be.
Someone that makes you smile, someone that’s gonna hold you, when darkness comes around.
Whenever you need someone that’s not gonna lie,
someone that would never hurt you …
’
“That’s just it, Sebastian. You should never think you need to be someone else for me. I know that everything you’re saying is true–you could–and it’s from the bottom of your heart. You’ve been so good to me already. More than I deserve you to be. But the problem is–I can’t. We can’t be that–and you know why. It just can’t happen.”
Right as he saw Blaine’s lips curl up into a smile, Sebastian flashed one right back. It was impossible to see that grin full of brightness && not feel warm inside. ( In Sebastian’s experience, at least. ) He expected to get a surprised reaction, but not one so positive. But they never ended on a bad note, it was just a matter of drifting away. Something Sebastian thought about a lot. The phone calls turned into texts && eventually the texts turned into none at all. But now here he was, after making the impulsive choice to fly out to New York for a fresh start. It hadn’t hit the point where he felt like he had found his place in this city, but seeing this familiar face made him feel more than at home. It was a happy nostalgia, no storm clouds.
He’s done a lot of maturing since the high school days, he’s done some soul searching too. But still, his future was unknown. It was like he needed a puzzle piece to remind him who he really was. Of course, he would never admit to the fact that he knew the puzzle piece was Blaine Anderson. Hands in his pockets, he looks to the floor with the linger of his smile still present. It only took a short moment before he focused his stare back on Blaine, absorbing all of the moments that he’s missed with him in the span of seconds. An eyebrow raises, grin growing again the more he stares down at his lost love friend. ❛ Surprised to see me, huh?Trust me,I’m a little surprised I ended up here too. New York was never really my style. But my dads hopes of me attending law school wasn’t really doing me any good, so I dropped out && took a one way flight here. I’ve been living on my funds ever since. My father will be pretty pissed when he finds out I ruined his little master plan of me becoming a lawyer but until then I’m pretty satisfied. Pissing him off is kind of a guilty pleasure of mine. ❜
Sebastian standing next to his table still felt like a dream. One that was too good to be true. Too out there to really be happening. The odds of them crossing paths in such a random encounter in one of the most populated cities in the world just never worked that way in real life. Yet they did today. Blaine’s mind was still blown. Eyes locked on Sebastian’s as he absorbed the other’s presence and let it settle in that they were talking–in person–after whatever string of weird events that lead up to this. Laughter. How could he not laugh at the question? “Surprised is a good word. I’m not sure if I can think of a better one. We’ll go with surprised.” So Sebastian’s showing up with movie quality perfect timing was thanks to him wanting to make his father have another reason to rant? Blaine wasn’t sure if that was the greatest decision Sebastian made. His father didn’t need anymore goading than his lack of tolerance for anything out of his control–Sebastian in particular. “You know he’s going to lose his mind but if you’re happy? I’m glad you’re standing up for yourself and doing things your way.” Any talk of Smythe Senior was best had with a lot of liquor to burn the taste out of both their mouths.
Blaine was never impressed by the man. When it came to fathers? They both missed out on the crapshoot that might’ve landed them ones either one were overly fond of. He was lucky enough that his father was mostly absent with splashes of popping back home to remind him it was so much better when he was gone. Sebastian’s was just always there making his son’s life hell. Blinking out of his worry for Sebastian’s inevitable father-son confrontation–Blaine stood up. “I’m sorry. It’s–still hard to believe that you’re here.” Hazel met green and it took him more than one attempt to look away. Stopped short of pulling out a chair–which was his initial intention–Blaine gave into impulse. Like it’d been yesterday since they last saw each other–Sebastian was pulled into a tight hug with his would’ve-been-offered seat only halfway drawn out. “It’s really good to see you,” Blaine softly mumbled over the top of his shoulder then pulled back and clasped both giving him a good once over now that they were this close. A stuttering start later–he offered him his seat. “P-Please, have a seat? Unless you’re here to meet someone?” Why was his heart suddenly beating faster as he hinged on what Sebastian would say?
pianokeysandbowties back up 