Sebastian felt empty. He knew that Blaine walking out wouldn’t make him feel any better. The damage was done now, and he wouldn’t be able to get Blaine out of his head for weeks, much less the next few hours, locked in a white room alone and bored out of his mind. He was between a rock and a hard place, as he usually was when it came down to Blaine. The other staying would only give him bitterness over the fact that he wasn’t SUPPOSED to be there in the first place, and that nothing good ever came out of it in the end. He’d gone through that road too many times now not to know better. And on the other hand, he didn’t want to be alone either, but it seemed like the only option. He played vaguely with the idea of going through phone’s contacts, looking for someone he could call, that’d actually show up to something like this. There was none, of course. He didn’t have FRIENDS, not like Blaine, he had booty calls, and acquaintances. And for most part he was fine with it. Except for times like these.
Blaine looked like he was about to implode, and Sebastian felt pissed about how much he hated to see him like that, and yet he also knew he’d hate more to see a different type of guilt in his eyes. He wondered if Blaine regretted ever helping him. He felt his throat tighten bitterly, and he had to ask. He had to know what was going through Blaine’s head when he did that. If he even cared at all, still.
He looked at Blaine as Blaine didn’t look at him, and felt frustrated that he couldn’t just see through the honeyed eyes, like he usually did. He screwed his eyebrows at the words, frowning, then swallowed.
“Sure… Just not enough, right?” Only enough to put them through shit, but not enough to want to actually stick around. “I can’t— DO this, anymore, Blaine. We can’t keep starring in this shitshow. This whole pretending I’m one of your ducklings, thing. It’s not true. We both know that. And it feels like hell.” He swallowed, tighter, chapped lips parting. He hated to admit those things, but he had no choice. “This halfway thing we’ve always had, it doesn’t work.” He gave him a look, daring Blaine to contradict him. Even back when they were just trying to be friends, Blaine was embarrassed of it, hiding it from his real ones, keeping Sebastian at arm’s length. And even after they’d finally shared a bed, it’d still been a font of guilt and shame, and something that could never live out of four walls. “Never did.” He grasped at the sheets on his lap with his non injured hand. “And it doesn’t go anywhere good.” He downed his eyes then, looking sideways. “You gotta let go.” And I do too.
Hurt eyes watched Sebastian warily. His breath stopped and he was frozen. Every bit of himself waiting for the reaction to his reply to come crashing down because that was exactly what he knew was going to happen. Sebastian asked the question but he already had the answer in his head. Blaine’s gut told him that regardless of how what he said? Sebastian’s mind was made up. He made a mistake. He wasn’t welcome here. Nothing he said he did could change those two facts. But he didn’t regret coming. There wasn’t a shred of a fiber in his being that would allow him to turn his back on someone he cared about after witnessing them nearly die and walk away as if he was never there.
Blaine would rather take any amount of pain than live with the question of what might’ve happened had things been a little worse when they got here. If Sebastian might’ve been gone forever in a matter of minutes. Or hours. He would have to live with himself knowing that he was last person who to see him and could’ve been there. Only, instead, he simply left him to suffer alone. Maybe that amount of guilt was what he deserved. Not knowing, going home, sitting up forever reading the newspaper or calling hospitals to see if Sebastian made it without him being any the wiser that someone out there was worried. Maybe that panic was what fate decided to dish out to him. God knows he was a horrible person to him when they were close. What right did he have to the peace of mind that he felt last night knowing Sebastian was safe and he’d be okay? None.
Nor did he have any right to hope that this might be some sort of turning point. That Sebastian would listen to his truth and, if he was willing, let him be there to help. A groundwork for something better than they ever had. Something built from the literal pavement up.
“I get it,” his voice cracked and his heart fell, “I never gave you enough. You’ve made that abundantly clear. All of this was a mistake. I understand. How many times do you have to say it? I messed up. Is it really a surprise? That’s all I ever seem capable of doing with you. I made the wrong choice coming and an even poorer one when I stayed. I hurt you. Again.” Deserving nothing and expecting too much, Blaine’s gaze dropped to the ground when Sebastian finally spoke up and said what he was anticipating. In very easy to understand simplicity. Time to let go. For real. Time to say goodbye and never come back. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for things to turn out like this. Or any of it to turn out the way it did. I—it doesn’t matter.” His shoulders slouched and he looked all the more small the more he caved into himself. Like he’d just curl up until he disappeared if he had the ability. “I’ll listen. You won’t see me–” A pained sound left him at the last part and he was crying but hospitals were used to that. “–I promise, Sebastian.” He couldn’t breathe and his throat couldn’t squeak out the last of what he had to say, so he smiled a goodbye and turned to go before he really lost it in front of him. Cause that was his own problem to deal with.
I didn’t think you’d want anyone else here. He sighed. He didn’t. And he DID. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t want anyone else there, not Blaine, much less his father. In a way, even if Blaine hadn’t helped the way he’d HOPED for, he still did, distracting Sebastian from being scared about what happened, or focusing on the pain and his injuries. He filled Sebastian’s head with memories and old feelings he didn’t want, but that at least kept him from focusing too hard on the present, made facing this with a blase attitude easier.
He blinked when Blaine moved fast to get the water for him, and more at the way his hands shook as he poured it. ❝…Thanks.” He said, long fingers curling around the cup with a hesitant look up, confused, as he drank, and maybe a little annoyed. Annoyed that he had to do this, that he HAD to remind Blaine why he should be away, that he HAD to be the one to tell him those things and then see Blaine get hurt. He groaned, finishing the cup and putting it aside as he ran a hand through the side of his hair. “It’s not what I WANT that matters here, Blaine —-” was it ever?
He rested back against the bed and drifted his green eyes towards the other, lips drawn tight at the sight in front of him. How was it that he almost died, and still managed to feel like crap because BLAINE wasn’t doing okay? “What’s up with you?” He blurted out, before he could even want to shut himself up. He frowned at him. He watched him grab his coat, and swallow. A mistake. Right. It always was, wasn’t it? Sebastian knew he was right and yet, it stung on the pop of his jaw as he heard him say it. “Little too late for that now, killer.” His tone was quiet this time, almost gentle, defeated.
“…Why?” He asked, just as Blaine reached the door, between his teeth. He kept staring down at his injured hands, tugging on a loose line on the sheets until it started to unravel. “Why ARE you here? Why did you come?” Just to torture me? To rub in my face a crumb of what I’ll never have? Because he wouldn’t, would he? He’d never have anyone ACTUALLY waiting for him in a hospital. Someone allowed to, by family ties. He’d never have a worried fiancé, fretting over him, not like Blaine did and gave. Much less LIKE Blaine. As perfect as him. This, waking up alone in a hospital bed, was probably gonna be the way he’d end his final chapter one day. If this wasn’t a joke from Blaine, it was definitely a joke from the Universe.
“It is about that. I really didn’t want to make you upset. It was a stupid thing to do. I was stupid..” It couldn’t be any more clear that he messed up. In more ways than one. Getting the hell out of here would be the only way to fix things. And he was never one for staying where he wasn’t wanted or needed. Even worse? Where he wasn’t welcome. How could he have thought the opposite? That there could be any other reaction to his being here other than this one? His eyes burned, his throat felt like it was caving in and he just wanted to put as much distance between the hospital and himself than he could in as little time possible.
Flustered and with a darkening shade of crimson coloring his nose, cheeks and bleeding down his neck–Blaine laid his coat over his arm and palmed over his mouth trying to swallow the bitter pill that he’d messed up bad before he turned around and gave Sebastian a weak, wobbly smile. Their eyes didn’t meet. He kept his gaze aimed closer to Sebastian’s mouth rather instead. It was better to smile and go. Then stay gone this time. For good. No more heroics. Even if the universe, for some sadistic reason, put him on the sidewalk when Sebastian got hurt? Walking away would have been better. You know what they say about hindsight..
There’d never a mistake like this made again. Blaine made that promise to the both of them on his way to the door. When he heard the question, he had half a mind to ignore it. What help could the answer give the situation? His mouth opened but only a sigh broke free. His fingertips toyed with the cold metal handle as he pressed his lips together tight and bowed his head. A tap later and his hand fell away, turned into a small fist and was shoved into his pocket. Against his better judgement, he turned just far enough to look towards the bed and Sebastian. I saw it happen and it was terrifying. I’ll never get that sound out of my head.
“Because I got scared seeing you like that. I had to make sure you were gonna be okay. Then when I got here? I couldn’t leave you to wake up alone and hurt. You..” His teeth bit away what he was going to say against his bottom lip and he chose something safer. “I couldn’t say whatever and leave. I shouldn’t have stayed. Or came at all. I get it. But that doesn’t change that I did and for no other reason what I said. I had to because you’re you and I’m me. Do you really think I could leave you there like I couldn’t care less? Cause that’s not who I am or ever was.” He swallowed thick, trying to get his point across without saying too much or too little.
❝…” Yeah, I did… Sebastian stared at him as Blaine echoed his words, with a stupefied expression, expecting not so patiently for him to elaborate even though he had a feeling Blaine wasn’t going to. Or that his elaboration wasn’t going to help much. Now that the doctor was gone and he was feeling a little less dizzy, he could see how unusually pale Blaine looked, and a glance down told him he’d been twisting his fingers in the nervous way he used to whenever something was on his mind. But the time when Sebastian used to notice (or care about) those little things was long gone, and he forced himself to look away. It was NOT his job to care anymore, and it’d taken him what? Almost a decade to start jotting that down? He wasn’t going off the rails now.
“I can’t believe you.” He stated, shaking his head. “Yeah? Well, most of us don’t live in romcoms, Blainers, and no matter what those might say, you really CAN’T smile your way into a non relative’s hospital room. I’d know.” He’d spent many a night alone in hospitals, from a kid to adulthood, it wasn’t anything new for him, and that type of movie magic was a little too strong for even Blaine Anderson to pull off. “Of course he isn’t.” He sighed out, then stopped.
“You did?” He’d thought that meant the didn’t know, Shirley Temple, that was, that Blaine had made some excuse, because when it came to Sebastian and Blaine’s gang of muppets he, somehow, no matter the circumstances, always ended up as the excuse. He raise an eyebrow as he glanced at him, before licking his lips. He tried to reach for the table and winced. “Since you’re here. Can you… Get me some water..? I’m freaking parched. The painkillers…” He made a gesture towards his mouth, he was used to that too, having had his fair share of hospital rendezvous. " ‘Throw a wild guess out there, and say they don’t know about the fiancé part?” He glanced at him. He hadn’t even expected Blaine to tell them he was with Sebastian at the hospital, so he wasn’t exactly judging, but still- “Tell me why I shouldn’t tell the next nurse the truth, here.” He said slowly, as he looked at him, not defensive now, just tired. Exhausted.
They both knew where this road lead. And it wasn’t anywhere good. It was beyond ironic that he was the one not willing to “pull the prank” so to speak and fool these people, to tell the lie, to play the part, because in this case, the part would leave him hanging, dry, and hurting a hell lot more than this car accident, and he knew it. They’d done this so many times now. It never ended well. Either one or both of them ended up injured one way or another, and Sebastian was tired. He was tired of having any kind of hope. It’d been years now, but even just being in the same room like that, having Blaine say he wanted to take care of him, that he was worried for him, was already starting to cut him open. “Can we just skip to the end? You heard doctor strange, I’m fine. I’m gonna be great. Thanks… For being here, getting– us engaged and all that jazz. Time to go back to your actual fiancé. You know, that one you took a town over to my boarding school, to propose to. I assume he’s still the one.”
Blaine was obviously not done messing with his fingers. His hands slid out from underneath him, dug at his knees. Knuckles bled to white as he clasped them together, shoved them between his thighs and dug his thumbnails into the fleshy part of his hand just under them on their opposite sides. Later one, there’d be crescent shapes pressed in that might leave a bruise. He was searching for any amount of approval of what he did. For the reasons why. For Sebastian to show him any sign that he was glad he didn’t wake up hurting and alone in the hospital. A smile. It could be tiny. Or laced with some snarky comment that might brush off how much he meant what he was saying. Anything from the pages of their past that might amount to something substantial enough to hang onto.
What he got was anything BUT what he was looking for. ‘I can’t believe you.’ Clamping his mouth shut, he immediately broke eye contact and his lap was instantly locked in his sights. His entire posture sank making him seem smaller than normal where he sat on the large sleeper chair. “I know you can’t. That’s why I lied..” Lifting his chin just enough that he could peek over Sebastian, he nodded. “I didn’t think you’d want anyone else here.” Seems Sebastian didn’t want ANYONE here (including him) but Blaine had the foresight enough to know that Kurt was probably the LAST person on Earth he’d want. Risking what might happen when he got home, he’d warded him away.
Seeing Sebastian wince, Blaine was already half out of his seat when he was asked for water. Trembling hands reached for the pitcher as soon as he rushed close enough to grab it. Water splashed onto the fake wood grain surface of the hospital bed table but he managed to get enough into the cup. “Because I’ll leave without you getting me kicked out of here. If that’s what you want me to do. And it is. I can see.” Once his hand was free of the cup, he stepped back and pressed his lips together. He could see it clear as day when he met Sebastian’s gaze. His hope to be a soothing presence was a failure in the worst kind of way. It was time to go. Staying any longer was only going to worsen the insult he hadn’t meant to dish out from the beginning.
“Okay,” his heart broke in ways it shouldn’t. In ways it didn’t have the right to. As Sebastian said, he’d made his choice. Starry eyed and love struck, he made his choice. What time did between now and then didn’t matter. His throat felt like it filled with rocks that were digging in and tightening up his chest, stomach. One word and Blaine turned, went back to his chair and grabbed his coat from where he had it shoved into the corner and draped over the back to use as a makeshift pillow. What else did he have left to say out loud anyway? Sebastian didn’t want to hear that he was welcome. That he was here because he was petrified he might’ve lost him on the street. That he didn’t want to go and a huge part of him never wanted to leave. Sebastian wouldn’t want to hear any of it. His chance for an open ear died at the bottom of a staircase. Warmth surrounded him when he pulled it on.
“This was selfish. A mistake. I’m so sorry for how I made you feel, Sebastian.”
sebastian raised curious, confused, green eyes as the doctor walked in, and then they widened for a moment. oh. so he HADN’T imagined blaine there, after all. blaine had actually… he felt the urge to groan and bury his face in his hands. he tried to scramble through his memory to find out if he’d said anything EMBARRASSING, while bleeding on the sidewalk. he thought he remembered telling blaine he missed him, and he hoped to hell that was just inside his own head. he couldn’t have, could he? then again, none of this made any fucking sense. like the fact he’d actually walked into a cab with a drunk driver and never even noticed. have you been here all this time? he wanted to ask, but it felt pointless, and he wouldn’t get into it in front of the doctor.
❝so what’s wrong with – ?’ he asked, before the doctor could even speak, seizing the man with tired distrust. he’d never liked doctors much, since they were always trying to FIX him. he stopped short on his words, though, at what he heard NEXT, never finishing his sentence ( … me? ). he stared at the doctor in disbelief. lips parted, and almost dreaded turning his head to the side, to meet BLAINE, though he felt like he couldn’t help it, as his attention was dragged to the side.betrothed? betrothed?!!his eyes said as they met caramel ones, color coming to his face like it never happened, and burning it up with complete shock. he had actually- blaine had not only stayed, he’d lied to do so, which had got to be eating up inside him, if sebastian knew him any. and he still DID. did he feel THAT much pity? sebastian didn’t get it. the doctor was still speaking but his ears were ringing.
only when the man started speaking to him, again, did he tear his sarcastic expression and raised eyebrows out of blaine, and onto him, but the other didn’t seem to have noticed anything. sebastian stared a little vacantly as he spoke, only relieved that blaine’s comment hadn’t really meant anything as it seemed, and he was going to be fine. he sunk back onto the pillows and closed his eyes for a moment, nodding some, before opening them again as the doctor left. he’d have to stay at the hospital for at least one day more, until they were sure his lungs would be fine, and then he’d have to stay bandaged and caring for his ribs for a while, and probably use some kind of support on his dislocated fingers. he pressed his lips slowly as the door closed, and bit on them hard as he stared at it.
‘you told them.’ he started very slowly. ‘i’m your fiancé?’ he more stated, than asked, before turning his head towards the other, eyebrows up on his hairline, as though saying are you INSANE? he huffed out a bitter laughter and shook his head as he brushed his face. this had got to be a joke. the entire thing. a sick joke from the universe. ‘you gotta be KIDDING me.’ he mumbled, muffled, into his bruised hands. he dropped them. ‘so when can i expect peakurt to walk in and make a scene?’
Blaine didn’t realize that under the intense weight of Sebastian’s unwavering, righteously shocked ‘what the flying hell’ stare that he’d begun to wring his hands together. Fingers gripping palms and scraping back and forth in white knuckled tenseness. Who could blame him? Even if he couldn’t bare being looked at the way Sebastian was looking at him now by anyone.. The sheer intensity of the gaze directly right into his deer-caught-in-the-headlights eyes would have been enough to give him a complex about it if he hadn’t had one years before. His biggest problem wasn’t the bubble of guilt that lying put in his belly the previous day that kept growing the longer he sat in silence throughout the night. Or that it was an absolutely INSANE idea to say what he said in the first place (but Sebastian was hurt and he was desperate to make sure he was okay and not leave him alone–so what other options did he have??).
Still. Both of those issues were small-cheese compared to the scenario that blurred into his mind and slowly became clearer and clearer with each breath the doctor took. How Sebastian was going to react to this (aside from the stunned expression and increasingly red tint to his pale, freckled skin) was so up in the air and he couldn’t figure it out because he was on the verge of a panic attack just thinking about the next ten minutes. Blaine barely heard the doctor finish giving Sebastian the rundown of what was going to happen past the explanation of his injuries. His mind was too busy elsewhere and the voice in the room sounded muffled. Like his head was buried in a pillow and he had the sides pulled up to block out his ears. If only he was that lucky.
He was sorry. Sorry that he used that reason to be here. Sorry that he didn’t tell the truth. However, what he was sorriest about? Was that Sebastian found out. Yes, he was dumb enough to not think of the consequences. But he had no time and hoped that he might be able to skim past the reason he was being given so much leeway to stay by chalking it up to politeness going a long way. Or something equally as flimsy but hopefully-might-work-worthy. Cat out of the bag having come and gone? They were alone and he had the rippling thunder of the door shutting still echoing in his brain when the relief he felt from Sebastian giving the doctor his attention was gone and it was right back on himself.
“Y-Yeah. I..did,” he answered matching Sebastian’s voice and with a cramp snapping his attention back to his hands that hadn’t stopped moving, he grabbed onto both tight and shoved them between his thighs practically underneath them. Long lashes veiling his eyes from sight fluttered to show he was searching for the answer of what to say next in the weave of his pants and coming up empty handed. Looking back up wasn’t an option and he kept his head down. “They wouldn’t let me,” his voice trailed off as he skipped yet another part of potential awkwardness and clung to the mess he was in instead, “stay here if I didn’t…say something. I didn’t want to leave. Kurt isn’t coming. No one is.” His gaze lifted but he kept his chin tucked down. “I asked them not to. I’m sorry…I did this. I only.. I wanted to stay.”
// Hi! Sorry! I haven’t been the greatest for a few days. Ended up in the Emergency Room last night. Doing so-so. It’s gonna take me another day or so to get back on my feet. My painkillers are stomping my rear and I barely slept (doing a lot of that tonight tho!). I wanted to give you cats a heads up! On Discord off and on! Mutuals message me for it if you want!
( mssg » santana | sent ) I know I said that I didn’t think you needed to be here.
( mssg » santana | sent ) I made a mistake. I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. All I do is stare at the monitor trying to pick apart the colors on the screen like I can diagnose if I need to run to find a doctor because something’s wrong. ( mssg » santana | sent ) They said he’s going to be okay but I can’t convince myself he will be. I don’t trust anyone. I keep thinking what if they’re wrong? What if something happens before Burt’s plane lands? ( mssg » santana | sent ) I think I need you to keep my head on straight. Please?.
sebastian slept soundly through the night. better than he honestly had in months if he was being honest. blaine’s voice soothed him towards his dreams and even against his will, his battered body couldn’t help but relax completely under the spell of it.
the doctors had said he’d been lucky. as though there was anything lucky about a near punctured lung, three broken ribs, a dislocated shoulder and scrapped skin all over. he supposed in some sadist way, he was. it could have been worse. he had to at least appreciate the irony of his drunk driving not being the problem. he’d caught a cab, exactly so he’d be safe, as lydia kept telling him to be, and then his damn driver had decided to lose control and drive them straight to a street light post.
the driver, having been wearing his seat belt, was mostly fine. but sebastian had few face first into and straight through the wind shield. he remembered that. what he DIDN’T remember was the rest of it. not all at once, at least. there were bits and pieces. juggled memories. flashes of blaine’s honeyed eyes on him, and gloved hands grabbing his skin on places that HURT.
all that were confused thoughts in his head, as he laid, semi-awake, slowly gaining consciousness. it took him quite a few minutes to be able to even blink his eyes open. when he did, he glanced down at the pressure that was making his hand numb, only to find blaine’s face on it. sebastian moved it slowly, wincing at the pain, and the burns on his face when he flinched, sighing as his movement seemed to waken the other. he licked his lips as his eyes met blaine’s, and among everything he wanted to say, six words blurted out, instead.
❝does he know you’re here?’
Somehow during the night Blaine managed to shift himself around on the chair enough that with his shoes kicked off and his legs curled up underneath himself–he was able to rest his head down against the top of his hand and doze lightly. If Sebastian so much as moved–he’d snap awake. Or so he thought. In reality–once he finally closed his eyes? Sleep hit him like a ton of bricks and he didn’t notice anything about the uncomfortable chair or the sterile smell of the hospital he hated. Or the nurse checking in once then leaving them both be.
A few hours went by–maybe less? The flinch was enough to finally draw his eyes open. His head stayed put for a second–tilting just enough that he could look up at Sebastian and meet his eyes. God, his back was going to hate him when he righted himself. But Sebastian was far worse for wear than a grumpy spine and not much sleep.
Was it possible to feel worry and relief together? Because seeing Sebastian looking down at him–awake, save and alive filled him with a sense of one. While seeing how hurt he was and the memories that flooded in after it–panic, sheer panic when he realized who he was helping, Blaine was terrified–brought on the other. –He’s okay. That’s the point. He’s okay..–
Blaine knew exactly who that question was about and why Sebastian asked it. He just didn’t expect it to be the first thing to be said. Lifting his head and letting one leg shift to rest the back of his knee over the side of the opposite foot so it could hang over the chair–Blaine squirmed upright and settled into the corner of the chair. “Y-Yeah. He knows. He wanted to come down here but I told him not to.” Why and the rest could stay unspoken.
“Apparently not. I really don’t know that much, I try to stay out of drama as much as possible. You know me Blaine.” Nick sighed. “But honestly? This is the first time something this bad has ever happened to the Warblers. It is taking a long time to fully comprehend anything that has happened.” He looked at Blaine sadly. When Nick answered his question he sighed. “okay.” He replied, wanting to say “good” but everything is not good. This is not how things should be. He nodded. “I wont say anything, promise. And you know me, Blainers. I KEEP my promises.” He said, looking at his phone to see the time. “I probably should get going. The nurses said I had like 10 minutes until visiting hours were over when I passed them.” He sighed, getting up from the chair that was next to Blaine’s bed.
“I know you do,” but he couldn’t hide the relief that showed clearly when Nick promised he wouldn’t tell on Sebastian. Blaine wanted to handle things first for a number of reasons. The main one being Sebastian’s homelife put aside? He had questions for Sebastian that he wanted answered himself. Not from parents or authority figures. Worse yet? The police. He was already getting ready to lie to them once he was told that after he rested they’d be there to get a statement. The idea of talking to them? It hit too close to memories of the past he’d fought hard to put away. And still–on quieter nights–had the uncanny ability to sneak up and catch him off guard enough to make a sliver of panic creep back in with the memory that’d play out before he could put a stop to it. Tonight? It’d done it twice. Like that night was waiting with a vengeance for a chance to be remembered. This time? He planned on lying to them. Which made Nick’s and the other Warblers silence crucial. “Nick? Wait–sit down. A few more minutes won’t hurt–right?”
Nick knew that Blaine leaving Dalton was in the past and he couldn’t undo anything, even if he really wanted to. Nope, not at all. He felt for Blaine, he was unable to do anything and it was all up to the New Directions and they have done the work. He shook his head, looking down. “No, not really. All I really know is that he was jealous of what you and Kurt had, and that is why he wanted it to happen to him and not you. Still doesn’t make it right. But the only thing he told us was that it was JUSTa slushie before hand.” Nick told his friend, remembering the day. It all went so quickly and then continued. “We all just found out what he put in, it was rock salt… gosh Blaine if I had ANY idea it would happen I would have stopped it in a heart beat. There is no doubt about it. I am so sorry this happened to you. Let me tell you something, he will get what is coming. Dalton’s zero tolerance policy might finally have a use.” He said, grabbing his friends hand. “How do you feel though really? Does it hurt? Of course it hurts, sorry.” He said looking down at the floor. He did’t know why he couldn’t talk to Blaine in this state. This is not how things should be. “I am glad to see you too Blaine. You have no idea. Things will get better soon. Warblers honor.”
“I thought my relationship wasn’t an issue anymore.” That was wrong. Blaine knew that “cloud” lingered in the background of their conversations that often borderlined on inappropriate. Ones he denied to Kurt were anything close. To the point that he felt guilty for lying. But he didn’t think the underlying tension would come to a head like this. Above all? Sebastian was his friend. A betrayal of stealing a setlist and announcing it to his friends where he got the information was an extreme in Blaine’s book. One he had yet to confront Sebastian on but after he got over the hurt? He fully planned on doing. Until–things spiralled even worse and here we are. An extreme that went beyond–beyond. Everything was broken. Blaine was left sitting in the hospital overnight wondering how he could have saw it coming and stopped it. Instead of feeding into it like he felt he did. This was all so screwed up. “It hurts–yeah. They kept me here because–under eighteen and just taking safety measures. I’ll go home in the morning til I come see a specialist and they determine the extent of the damage and what has to be done.” Don’t even get him started on how petrified he was when he thought about what might happen if it was too much. No amount of reassurance from the E.R. doctor could put that worry to rest. “Nick? Before any of you say anything? I want to talk to Sebastian first. Listen. I haven’t named him as being the one who did it. I got in trouble but..I know what he goes through at home. If his Dad found out? Can you tell the guys to let me talk to him? Just–don’t say anything yet. If it comes to that–we can. I promise. Please promise me too, okay?”
Nick could not help himself. He could have done something to help prevent this. If only he knew that this would happen, Sebastian’s stupid actions could have been worse, thankfully they were not but that is besides the point. He wiped the tear from his cheek and sat down, taking a deep breath as if it would help compose himself. He smiled at boy next to him, he really missed Blaine so much. Nothing has ever been the same since Blaine left Dalton. “I am fine really…except my best friend is in the hospital because of something the Warblers- well Sebastian did. So no I am not okay.” He paused. “How are you?” He questioned him. “That is the real question. I am sorry I just now came… I wanted to come to your side when it happened. That is one of my biggest regrets.” He told him. Sebastian went way too far, Blaine had to have a surgery to help him get better and that had to be expensive. He knew it was.
Blaine bowed his head to blurrily watch his hands ball two fistfulls of blankets. This was all so wrong. The Warblers became his competition when he left Dalton–true. But he always had it in mind that they were brothers before rival performers. Nick, Jeff, Trent and the others were undoubtedly the catalysts to him becoming who he was after being a shell of himself. Dalton and they saved him. They knew him. Knew what happened. And they promised that they’d always be there for one another. Yes. He left physically but the his love for them? Ran deep. Deeper than performances and song lists. The bond they had was supposed to survive everything. Or maybe he wouldn’t have–no. He couldn’t think that. Leaving Dalton wasn’t a mistake but leaving them vulnerable and in the hands of someone that could make them into what he saw inside that parking garage? Felt like his responsibility. Whether it or was or not. “I’m so sorry that you’re upset, Nick. You got here as quick as you could. Honestly? I’m just glad to see you,” he smiled but there wasn’t enough unf in it to be much of one. “What was he thinking? Has he said anything? If that’d hurt Kurt,” he clamped his mouth shut and shrugged. What was he supposed to say on how much worse that would’ve been?
pianokeysandbowties back up 